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A recruiter for software company AvePoint Inc. wears t-shirt as he meets job seekers at large career fair at Rutgers University in New Brunswick

Sophie Johnson writes:

I have been lucky for so many years now to have had the pleasure – in the vast majority of cases – to deal with people who treat everyone else with respect, good manners and consideration.

Yet when you meet someone who lacks very basic people skills it can in fact be a very positive experience, because it highlights just how rare they are.

And you know what? I pity them and I hope for their futures. If I could give them four pieces of advice, here is what I would say:

· Realise that the easiest way to judge someone’s character is to see how they treat people in all walks of life. It’s easy and obvious to suck up to your superiors in your job and to clients. You give yourself away when you change your personality when interacting with those who are there to serve you, or whom you perceive – for your own misguided reasons – to be lower status than you

· Mature. Don’t believe that throwing a tantrum will get you your own way, or that using threatening behaviour will make people do your bidding out of fear. Yes, sometimes in the short term it works, but all the while these people will be planning how they can get away from you forever

· Learn that having the loyalty of people around you can achieve amazing things. A sense of loyalty can drive people to walk through fire for you. It’s a rare gift to have that effect on people.

· Think about how your mood affects everyone else. Try not to spoil other people’s days with your own problems. Try. That’s the best we can all do

It really is that simple. The ones who don’t live by these rules are ultimately the real ones who suffer. If you follow these rules, you can help turn the place you work in, right now, into the best company in the world. And you might just turn into an amazing leader yourself.

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